The Woman in Room 23
by Twasover
Summary: Life is a lying bitch that fools you into thinking it bears no ill-will.


_A/N: This is an OS I wrote for Valentine's Day. I know it might not be very merry but I hope you'll enjoy it. Don't hesitate to comment and... I apologise. _ Ella_

* * *

 ** _« People know that they only live once but they forget that the same applies to others. »_**

Kidney dysplasia.

It all started with those two words. Two big words that meant that his son was born with only one functioning kidney. It could have never been an issue. In fact, they were completely oblivious to his condition until Roland started refusing to go to the toilets. It's a known fact that humans can live with just one kidney. It becomes more difficult when it starts failing in turn.

Robin's eyes sometimes water despite himself as he watches his son carefully colour the shapes inside his colouring book, making sure to stay within the bold black lines while his blood being drained by a big machine. Roland knows what's happening to him. He understands that his kidney isn't working properly and that it needs fixing. Children are resilient and fearless. To him, the hospital trips are more like an extra-school activity… to Robin, it's the hardest thing he's ever had to go through, but he has to have hope because his son deserves that.

So, he comes here three times a week with his boy for his dialysis treatment.

…

The hospital is being renovated. It's a bit of a mess. The pediatric ward is all the way to the other side of the main entrance and the only access is an elevator in the cardiac and respiratory centre.

This is where he sees her for the first time.

She's in room 23 and they pass by it every morning.

The blinds are never completely shut and the scene he witnesses almost always the same. She lies in bed, eyes shut but not asleep, fists tiredly clenching around the sheet.

He's never seen her from up close. He's unsure she ever leaves her room but with all these machines plugged to her body, he's not sure she could even if she wanted. Not that it's any of his business. It isn't so he usually looks away and keeps on walking towards the elevator.

She must have been here for a long time. Longer than Roland has been coming and it's already been a month for his boy.

…

He finds out about her name from a nurse.

He didn't ask. He would have never dared. He just happened to overhear her talking to an intern about her.

Later that day, when he passes by her room after having grabbed some toys from his car for Roland, his eyes linger onto her a little longer than usual. She still looks like she's in quite a bit of pain but she's fighting… She's a fighter.

 _Regina Mills_.

It fits her.

…

The first time he thinks about knocking on the door, it's because of Roland.

One day, as they walked past her room, he tugged on his father's arm.

"Do you know why she's always alone, Papa?" He asked, looking curiously at the woman.

"I… I don't my boy," Robin replied, his eyes falling onto her as well. "But we shouldn't stare like that. It's rude," he added, ignoring the pang in his heart at the thought of this woman having to whatever it is she's going through on her own. Nobody should ever be alone like this. "Come on, let's go."

That night, as he tucked his son in bed and laid next to him to read him one more chapter from the Adventures of Robin Hood, Roland quietly let out a "I'm glad you're here with me, Papa" and though, he was initially taken aback, his response is immediate:

"Always, my boy. Always."

So, he's standing here ready to knock on that door. Yet, he doesn't. Instead, he spins on his heels and goes back to where he came from, the reasons behind his cowardice unclear.

It's the following day that he works up the courage to do what he failed to do one day earlier, a small bouquet of yellow tulips in his hand. He figured there was nothing better than flowers to brighten up someone's spirit even though they're fake… at least he hopes so.

Her response comes in a faint and hoarse voice and he carefully opens the door.

"I didn't know nurses were required to bring patients flowers," she quips, breathily.

A smile instantly creeps onto his face. So, she's the sassy type… Nice.

"I'm not a nurse," he tells her, walking up closer to the bed and he can finally see her.

She's breath-taking. His breath literally caught in his throat the minute his eyes found hers. Big, brown beautiful eyes full of pain, boldness, wit, humour, sadness, joy… life…

 _God._

"Hey, I'm not sharing my cannula, so you better breathe in."

He regains his composure and laughs. She smiles, a tired but toothy smile before biting her lip.

"And I know you're not a nurse," she continues. "You're the weird guy that's been spying on me for the past month. How's your son doing?"

"I…"

 _Fuck._

"If you can see someone through a window… they usually can see you too." She inhales deeply through the cannula. "It's how it works."

"So, you're a smartass. I see."

"Well I am undeniably very smart and although you can't see I can assure you that I do have a great ass," she says wriggling her brows.

His jaw falls open and he looks at her, speechless.

"You might wanna put the flowers down or I have a feeling they'll end up on the floor."

He glances down at his hand and she's not wrong, he's barely holding the bouquet by a thread. He looks back up at her and she just stays silent watching him with a smirk on her face.

"Where should I put them?" He asks once he finds his voice back.

"With the others should be good."

He frowns and turns around before opening his eyes in surprise. Before him, there's two big bouquets of fake carnations standing on the drawer, he just couldn't see it from where the blinds opened.

"Calla lilies and carnations are my favourite flowers. Clearly," she adds, letting out a chuckle and he smiles though he can't help but feel stupid with the tulips he's carrying. "Next time, you'll know."

He looks back at her and she still has that bloody smile on her face and he just cannot help but grin in return. He lets out a chuckle and goes to put the tulips on the drawer making sure to put them right in the front, pushing the other two. He hears her snicker loudly and he smiles proudly. However, her laughs quickly turn into breathy bouts of cough.

"Are you alright?" He asks, rushing to her side.

She nods as she breathes in with difficulty.

"I am," she manages to say, and he acquiesces.

She reaches for the water next to her and drinks up a big gulp before putting it back down.

"So, dear stranger," she starts, settling more comfortably in her pillows, "what brings you to my humble abode?" She asks.

He spends an hour or so with her and he doesn't even see time fly by.

He tells her about Roland, about his disease and he finds out that she has a son who is the face behind the flowers. She's proud of her son. He can tell by the way her face lit up when she started speaking of him and it makes him smile with empathy. He knows the feeling.

She's easy to talk to. She's funny and she's right: she's very smart. She's passionate about the environment, something that she took from her father, she tells him. Because of that, she decided to become an environmental engineer and she's been such for 13 years. It's fascinating to hear her talk about her job, about how much she enjoys trying to find solutions to make our life easier, in harmony with nature.

He explains that he spends as much time as possible doing outdoorsy stuff with Roland, that he grew up not too far from the forest and spent his childhood climbing trees and learning to imitate animals' cries. She likes the forest too, but she admits being more of an ocean lover. That's actually where her first health episode happened. She was diving when she started feeling a pain in her chest.

"It was really… scary," she laughs. "Yes, that's the word. I've always been in control of my body. I know its limits and even if sometimes I liked to push a little, I know where to draw the line. That day, I felt completely helpless and it was… scary. Now, years later, I'm here with congestive heart failure and my life exclusively depends on that VAD machine until they find a donor."

He's sure she's going to find a donor and he tells her that. She thanks him for his confidence and tells him he would get along well with her son in that department and he realises that behind the smile and the confidence, she's scared and not very optimistic about the future.

It's alright, he tells himself. He has enough of that for both Roland and her.

Around 9, he has to live because he gave Will the day off and someone has to run the store, but he promises to stop by the following day with Roland.

"He would love to hear your diving stories," he tells her, and she smiles. "And, to be honest, he's the one who gave me the idea to come and visit you."

Her smile widens smugly before she lets out a "Next time, give the credit to whom its due when you lead."

He chuckles and nods.

"It won't happen again _milady_."

"Milady," she repeats. She thinks for a second before letting out a pleased "I like that. Keep calling me that."

"Will do," he answers with a laugh. "Goodbye Regina."

"Goodbye Robin."

…

Roland adores her.

His son has always been a very happy kid, full of life, always giggling but he's never seen him laugh so much in the span of a few minutes.

He doesn't say a word. He simply watches from his spot by the drawer as Regina tells him more about her diving adventures. The boy listens with attention, taking in every word as if they came directly from the Holy book, eyes widening whenever the story calls for it.

Regina lets out a throaty giggle, stroking his son's hair.

"Papa," he says suddenly, turning to look at his father. "I want to go diving like Regina."

Robin laughs, stepping away from the drawer.

"We'll see about that but for now we have an appointment so say goodbye to Regina."

"Can we come back later?" He asks eagerly, and Robin looks at her, questioningly.

She gives him a nod before looking back at Roland.

"Of course, you can come. I have many more stories to tell."

"Yeah!" Roland exclaims and Robin smiles like he hasn't done so in a very long time.

…

She's fascinating and he likes her, and he uses the word "like" because using any other would be downright crazy considering the fact that they've only known each other for two weeks but yes, he likes Regina Mills.

A lot more than he should.

…

It's on a Wednesday that he meets her son for the first time. He doesn't have class in the afternoon, so she tells Robin to stop by after Roland's dialysis.

His boy is tired that day, his new treatment hard to adjust to but he fights to stay awake to play with Henry.

Henry is a very well-behaved child though he's inherited his mother's sass which doesn't exactly come as a surprise to Robin.

Robin finds out that he was adopted when he talks about a woman named Emma who quickly dropped him off because "she had an emergency at the station".

"Who's Emma?" Roland asks with curiosity as he makes one of his toy cars roll onto Henry's arm.

Robin chides him for his indiscretion, ruffling his hair.

"That's okay," Henry assures, looking at Roland before explaining that Emma is his birth mother and that she was too young to take care of him, so she put him up for adoption and that's when his parents adopted him.

"So, you have two mommies?" Roland exclaims with wide eyes.

"Yep," Henry smiles.

"You're lucky. My mommy is in heaven."

Robin's face instantly drops at the thought of Marian, his wife gone too bloody young.

"Do you miss her?" Henry asks, gently.

"Mmh."

"I miss my dad too," the older boy then says and Roland's eyes round in surprise.

"He's in heaven too?"

"Yes."

"Do you think he knows my mama?"

He laughs and shrugs.

"Maybe."

"I think they're friends."

"You know what? I think so too."

Later, the two go to the cafeteria to grab some ice cream and Regina makes them promise not to be too long because Roland has to rest. They promise and Robin thanks her silently as the door closes on their two boys.

He smiles before taking Henry's sport by her sat and sitting on the now-empty chair.

"He's a great lad," he tells her and once again he sees that now familiar pride in her eyes as she smiles.

She takes in a breath, closing her eyes and brings a hand to her chest to rub it a little.

"Uncomfortable?" He asks.

"A little," she answers, looking back at him with a smile. "I'm sorry for your loss," she tells him. "I always assumed but I wasn't sure."

"That's okay. Thank you. And I'm sorry for your loss too."

She nods, thanking him with a smile.

Suddenly she shifts in the bed and her teeth dig into her lower lip.

"Are you okay?" He asks worriedly, and she nods, though the furrow of her brows don't quite convey the message. "Regina…" he insists.

"I'm okay," she assures, putting a hand on his arm. "It's just a little bit more painful than usual but it's fine."

"Why didn't you say anything when the nurse came to ask if you were okay?"

"I don't want Henry to worry."

That, he can understand.

"Well, Henry isn't here now. It's just me… You can talk to me."

She gives him a tired grin.

"Have I told you about that time I swam in the Baltic sea?"

He clenches his jaw disapprovingly, but she just smiles at him, her eyes shining with glee and he sighs deciding to drop it.

"I don't believe you have, no."

…

He starts stopping by every day before work or before Roland's dialysis… It becomes natural… a need. The need to see her face, to hear her laugh, to just know that she's okay… that she's still here, fighting with that smile of hers that make his heart swoon. _Such a beautiful sight._

Weeks go by and before he knows it, it's February.

He was never the type to celebrate Valentine's Day. Marian was never a fan either, so he never saw the point.

It's February and she's been at the hospital for months now and he sees the shift in her spirits as time passes by. She tries to hide it behind smiles and cheek, but he starts to know, he starts to know her eyes. That's why he decides to surprise her with the help of Will and Emma that he's come to know with his visits.

He knocks on the door a little later than usual with a bouquet of fake carnations and lilies just like she likes them.

"What is this?" She asks with a chuckle, looking up from her book and taking her glasses on.

"It's Valentine's day."

She lifts a curious brow as he puts the flowers on the drawer. He walks up to her and places a kiss on her forehead.

"How are you today?" He asks taking off his coat and scarf and heading towards the TV stand.

"I'm alright. Confused but alright."

He pulls out a DVD from his coat's pocket and places it into the player. He grabs the remote and goes back next to her.

"I brought you something."

"I saw," she says, eyeing the flowers.

"I brought you something else. A DVD and a fancy lunch," he says simply, pressing the commands on the remote. He turns to look at her. "I know you must follow a special diet, but I convinced the chief downstairs to cook you some braised leeks and salmon if I brought him the ingredients… which I did," he adds, wriggle his eyebrows.

She bites the inside of her cheek, trying to keep herself from smiling but she fails miserably and he's having the time of his life watching her attempts.

"And you just happen to know that it's my favourite meal or you just haven't lost your stalking habits?"

"What can I say? Some habits die hard.".

She can't help but laugh and he can't help but find extreme comfort in the now-familiar sound.

"And what are we watching?" She asks, looking up at the television screen.

"West Side Story."

He watches with attention her reaction, knowing very well the importance of the movie to her.

He didn't need his stalking skills to find that one. She told him herself. She told him how much she loved the movie and how she would watch it all the time with her father.

"You remembered," she whispers her eyes watering a little.

"Hey, I do listen when you speak," he teases, and she chuckles. "Now come on," he says, leaning onto the chair and putting his feet up on the bed. "Let's watch."

Silence settles into the room and the Metro Goldwyn Mayer lion starts roaring.

"So, does this whole thing makes you my Valentine?" He hears her ask as the whistling stops and the first notes of the opening start playing.

"Watch the damn thing," is his answer and she chuckles wholeheartedly.

He glances at her from the corner of his eyes and smiles.

She's grinning from ear to ear and yes, it's definitely the most beautiful sight in the world.

He lets out a quiet chuckle and looks back at the screen.

"Thank you," he hears her say and he slides his hand into hers, intertwining his fingers with hers.

…

There are some things in life that just shouldn't happen.

For instance, no parent should ever have to watch their child being hospitalized. It should not be a thing. It should not be how life works. It's cruel and it's fucked up.

Another thing that shouldn't happen is good people dying. Marian died, and she shouldn't have.

She's dying, and she knows it and he hates it.

He hates because she's lost the fight in her eyes and there's now only defeat. She's stopped fighting…

He hates it.

"How's Roland doing?" She asks him as he paces around in her room, jaw clenched, heart racing.

"He's okay. He's at school He's okay. The treatment is easier on him now. It's better." is the mumbling response he gives her.

Wishing for someone's else death is probably the most terrible thing one person can do but he wishes. He wishes so hard that a doctor will barge in the room and announce that they have a donor because she can't die. He doesn't want - she doesn't… She shouldn't be dying.

"Your pacing is stressing me out."

He stops and turns to look at her. She's sweating, and her eyes are welling with water… she's tired and probably scared and he's not helping.

"I'm pissed," he admits, tears of anger in his eyes.

She chuckles, closing her eyes a little and taking a short breath.

"I am too," she replies, looking back at him. "Yet, here we are," she says, shrugging weakly.

"I love you."

He didn't plan on saying the words. Frankly, he didn't know until that very moment that he felt them and that he felt them so strongly, but they came easily, naturally as if it weren't the first time he's uttered them to anyone, but Roland since Marian died.

Her response comes with a small smile and doesn't really surprise him.

"I know."

Of course, she does. She probably knew it before he even did because she's _that_ good. She's just brilliant… she's amazing.

He walks up to her side and slowly lowers himself to put a small kiss onto her lips. He parts from her, tears now rolling down his cheeks as he admits with a pang in his heart:

"I hate that I do."

She closes her eyes and a tear escapes as she whispers another "I know."

He shuts his eyes in turn and gently puts his forehead against hers.

"Couldn't you have come into my life a few years ago?" She asks in a whisper. "Now, it's too late."

"Don't say that," he tells her, his hand resting on the curve of her hip.

"You know it's true."

He remains quiet and simply rubs his forehead against, drawing abstract shapes on her hip bone.

"I love you too," she says suddenly, sucking on a breath, her voice trembling and his heart breaks inside his chest.

 ** _« Life is a lying bitch that fools you into thinking it bears no ill-will. »_**

…

She tells him on a day he is in a better mood. Roland's new treatment is working, and Robin feels weirdly optimistic about life. They're going to be alright. All of them. Roland and Regina and the four of them, with Henry will get a chance to be together and form the family his son has been dreaming about since the first time he met Regina.

"I want to give Roland one of my kidneys."

Shock doesn't even begin to cover it. There's that brief moment of joy in his heart because he's been dreaming about hearing the words "give" and "kidney" next to his son's name for so long now… for too long.

But then, there's confusion. Confusion because he knows she can't have such a big and invasive surgery. No doctor in their right mind would perform such a dangerous procedure on someone in her conditions… That's when realisation hits him, and all these emotions disappear and all that's left his anger.

"No!"

Her response is a smile and it drives him mad.

"You are not dying," he tells her adamantly.

We're all dying. Some sooner than others."

"Regina, I swear…"

"I talked with his doctor… I'm a match and my kidneys are healthy. I want to do that for him and I can."

He feels the tear dropping before he even realises the sudden blurriness of his vision.

"You can't ask me to do that."

"I would never which is why I'm not asking. I'm telling you."

He doesn't know what to say. He feels terrible, as if someone has their hand inside his stomach, twisting his guts. He wants to throw up. He wants to scream and cry and kick himself…

It shouldn't be like that. It shouldn't be this way. Roland… his boy…

"What about Henry?" He throws at her and it's cruel and he knows it. "He deserves his mum.'

"Yes, he does," she answers calmly as if she's been preparing this speech for days now and he wonders just how long she's been thinking about killing herself. "He deserves to have a mom and he did… But it's over Robin… There's no fixing me but there's fixing Roland. Don't you think I deserve to choose how I want to go?"

"You can't just stop fighting. You can't just resign yourself to death… I… Regina," he chokes up. "I want… I wish… I wish we had more time."

She smiles at him, a tear of her own rolling down her cheek.

"You loved me too late."

"I love you more than my life."

"Then you're an idiot. And still, it isn't about your life anyways."

"It's not fair that it has to be that way. I shouldn't be that way."

"Take what life gives you instead on focusing on what it doesn't."

 ** _«_** ** _Life gives but takes and takes and takes._** ** _»_**

…

She died.

A few minutes after the surgery, the doctor told him. She never even woke up - her heart just couldn't.

She saved Roland, but she died.

It takes him a lot to go there, to go see her but he has to. He has to see her one last time

Henry is with her, head lying against her chest, arm spread around her middle. Emma watches him from the window, unmoving, tears rolling.

"How is he?" She asks without turning.

"He's good. He's still sleeping… She saved him."

There is a pause but it's not a heavy one. It's necessary. A comforting silence so they can both process it all. She saved him. His son is alive and will be fine and he is so grateful… but she's gone, and he feels like crying.

"We hated each other when we met." Emma's voice brings him out of his thoughts and he wipes some tears again. "Now, she's my friend - she was… She raised my son, she made him the amazing boy he is today… I never thanked her and now…"

"She knew."

"I know but - Words should be spoken sometimes."

Yes. They should.

He enters the room after some time and Henry looks up at him, his face wet with tears. .

"I'm so sorry Henry," he tells him, and the boy simply nods before lowering his gaze back on his mother.

"How is Roland?" He asks after a bit as Robin approaches quietly.

"Sleeping… The doctors are optimistic."

A small grin appears on the boy's face.

"You hear that mom," he says, stroking Regina's hair. "You did it. You saved him."

Robin smiles as he stands on the other side of the bed, his hand sliding into Regina's.

"You were her biggest pride," he says after a bit and Henry looks up at him. "The biggest," he repeats.

"I'm gonna miss her so much," the boy tells him, more tears gathering in her eyes.

"I know buddy… I know but…" He glances down at Regina and somehow finds her to look even more beautiful than in his souvenirs. He smiles. "She's not hurting anymore. She's at peace now."

Then, he leans in and presses a soft kiss onto her lips.

"Goodnight _milady_."

 ** _« But still, that woman… the one in room 23,_**

 ** _she outlived life for a piece of her remains in that little boy but also, in all those whose life she touched. »_**


End file.
